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w w w . b o b a n d t o m . c o m

July 20 - 24, 2009

The Obama Man Man
When he stopped by a few months ago, Greg Morton did something he'd never done on the show before, sang a song. Little did we know that this tune would soon become an internet phenomenon, gathering over 3 million views on youtube, and landing on countless blogs and political website. Now known as the guy who sings the "Obama Man" song, Morton has actualy been a friend of the show for a long time and possesses one of the best live acts you'll ever see. He's two minute recap of the entire Star Wars saga is quite the crowd please, but it's his pop star impression filled finale that really steals the show. Greg has been featured on Comedy Central's Premium Blend, HBO and as a voice actor in the shows Super Mario Bros. 3 and Police Academy.

 

The Geoff Brown
If you watch comedy competitions on television, there’s a very good chance you’ve seen comedian Geoff Brown perform. Brown won the Star Search comedy competition in 1994, was featured on seasons one and three of Last Comic Standing, was a performer on Spy TV and has popped up on a number of sitcoms over the years. Before he entered standup comedy, Geoff was a member of the US marines, and though his fellow soldiers loved the way he kept cracking everyone up, his superiors thought his talents would be better utilized as a civilian, in places where he had no access to heavy artillery.

 
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Sounds Like Fun
Tim Cavanagh is a man who can come up with a song about anything, which is a skill that comes in quite handy when he sits down to write. From obscure holidays to oddball news stories, Tim is the man we turn to whenever we need a tribute to a subject that we never expected to need a song about. On the show, Tim is famous for previously being "One-Minute Song Guy" and currently for his Cavalcade of Celebrity Birthdays feature.

 

Living the High Life
Though people love television programs, it seems more and more that the water cooler discussions about TV revolve around commercials. Even the Super Bowl, which is the most watched show of the year, is often trumped by the ads that run between breaks in the game. And while the most companies have made major strides in creating memorable and humorous ads, the kings of the genre are the beer companies. These brewers of booze are responsible for some of the most beloved ad campaigns in history, and somehow they still manage to come up with new and original spots. One such ongoing series involves the removal of Miller High Life from establishments that are deemed unworthy of selling the product. Actor Windell D. Middlebrooks portrays the Miller delivery guy who’s on a mission to make sure only places that promote living the high life are allowed to serve it.

 
Snowflake Head
Described as being both "the girl next door" and "the girl who hates the girl next door", Andi Smith often surprises audiences with her funny and original perspective on life. Original and entertaining, Smith can find humor in everything from growing up in Wisconsin to ugly belts. Andi was a finalist on season five of Last Comic Standing, has appeared on Live at Gotham and recently released her first CD, Home Perm.
 
 

The Future is Now
Now that his run starring in his own one-man off-Broadway show "Sleepwalk With Me" has come to a close, you'd think Mike Birbiglia would want to take some much needed time off, but that's not the case. Instead, Birbigs is set to kick off his new "I'm In the Future Also" comedy tour which will be crisscrossing the country all summer long. Tickets for number of shows are available for pre-sale now. Check out his website for details. While there you can also watch some of his animated videos, read a few Secret Public Journal entries and maybe even buy a T-shirt or two.

 

Daniel Tosh vs. The Internet
Comedian Daniel Tosh has always been outspoken and outrageous, but until now, he has only used these talents for stand-up comedy. That all changed on his new show Tosh.0, where he is using his powers to take on the Internet, one blog, vlog, post and tweet at a time. Tosh is a Tonight Show veteran, is frequently on Comedy Central, has been featured on The Late Show with David Letterman a number of times, starred in a series of Taco Bell commercials and is one of the few guests we've allowed to remain in the studio after taking off his pants. Tosh.0 airs Thursdays at 10pm ET on Comedy Central.

 
Knowing When
to Get Out

Comedian Brian Dunkleman had a feeling that the reality television show he was working on was never going to amount to much, so he decided to bail as the co-host after the first season. Since then, American Idol has only become one of the biggest hits and most popular shows of all time. Doh! So, even though Ryan Seacrest is now one of the most reconizeable names in Hollywood, Dunkleman isn't bitter; he's been doing just fine on his own. He's appeared on The Tonight Show, Two Guys and a Girl, NYPD Blue, Friends and starred in the independent film Comedy Hell. And the best part is he doesn't have to spend countless hours with Simon and Paula.
 

Funny Chick
Comedian Melanie Maloy finds it awkward to describe her own act, so she asked us to do it for her.  She’s charismatic, energetic, refreshing, “out there,” and according the E! Network, she’s one of the top 50 Funniest People.  Maloy enjoys having fun with the crowd when she performs, priding herself on the fact that no two shows are ever the same. And while she doesn’t have a filthy act, she’s by no means G-rated.  Unlike most comedians who hide their work from their parents, Melanie was actually encouraged to pursue a career in comedy by her mother who talked her into try an open mic night.

 

Hello? Sweeney-San
If you ask him, or check out his media kit, Mark Sweeney will tell you he's a "professional comedian," even though his credits also include acting roles in Boston Public, The Visitor, and Days of Our Lives. Along with those TV programs, Sweenz has also starred in several independent films which leads us to believe he's done a lot of porn. The four years he spent in the US Marines were forgettable, either that or he just can't remember them. Though his military history is a bit fuzzy, he's constantly being reminded that at some point he attended college, which is why he's still on the run from the student loan collectors.

 

Fresh off the Links
Since Drew Hastings visits our studio more often than our cleaning crew, we figured he'd be a natural to have in while Tom is out recovering from his vacatin. Drew is not only one of the most brilliant comedians working today, he's also one of the only metrosexual "Gentleman Farmers" in the midwest. Unless you know of another guy raising pigs and growing corn while wearing a black mock turtle-neck sweater.

 

He's Got the Beat
When comedian Greg Hahn takes the stage, he does so with an energetic, all-out style of physical humor, one-liners and crowd work like you've never seen before. And once he lets loose, there's no stopping him because Hahn doesn't have time for laughs, he's out to create immediate pandemonium and panic. Hahn can wear an audience out with his rapid-fire jokes and leave them holding their sides, trying to catch their breath. Greg is one of the most manic comedians to ever enter our studio, something that was only amplified when we sat him in front of a full drum set last time he was here. Find the ringtone below.

 

Speaking His Mind
If you want to see a show where comedians can give you straight talk about important issues, than "Martin Lawrence presents 1st Amendment Stand-Up" is the program for you. And if you tune into this show every Friday at 11pm on Starz, you'll meet host and comedian Doug Williams, who also just happens to be perfect for you. Along with comedy, Williams has also been featured in the film The Nutty Professor, and the TV shows "The Bernie Mac Show" and "The Mind of the Married Man."

 

A Talk With Costaki
The only thing harder to spell than Costaki Economopoulos' name, is the weekly feature he hosts, The Economonologue. However, we figure that since it's a made up word, we've got a little wiggle room if we happen to misplace an 'o' or a 'u.' And though his is not a name you'd want to get as a puzzle on Wheel of Fortune, it is one you don't mind seeing on our guest board because he's one of the most clever comedians work

 

When Animal's Attack
For longer than we can remember comedian Tim Bedore has been joining us each Wednesday to deliver an editorial in which he talks about whatever happens to be on his mind. These musings can range from his relationship with his daughter, to hot topics in the news, and even updates on how the animal kingdom is waging war on mankind.

 

Time For an Image Makeover
Paul Mecurio has become a regular feature on the BOB&TOM show and we're fortunate to be a regular stop on his "mercurial" (sorry) journey. After walking away from a sweet Wall Street job he started as a staff writer for Jay Leno and soon found himself collecting awards for his work with the "Daily Show with Jon Stewart" where his duties currently include the pre-show warm up. He frequently performs this duty in a very personal way by doing his act while hanging out with the audience. Paul is currently featured on the Canadian Mist BOB&TOM All Stars Comedy Tour.

 

The One Star Warrior Goes Digital
Fans of the "Flute Man" and fans of digital downloads can now join forces as Greg Warren has finally entered the information age with the release of his new album, One Star Wonder, which is now available on iTunes. Comedy Central Records presents Greg's newest project which chronicles his life as a single guy who likes to eat alone, has a hard time picking up women, used to play the clarinet and doesn't like discounts at fancy hotels. Sure, there is more to his life than that, but you'll have to purchase the album to find out the rest. Sample the album here.

 
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With a Name LIke Sneed, He's Got to Be Good
Just a few short years ago Josh Sneed quit his ‘regular job’ at Procter & Gamble to pursue his dream of standup comedy. Since then, he's appeared on Comedy Central's Premium Blend and Ed McMahon’s Next Big Star (two shows his other job wouldn't have landed him on). Sneed’s other credits include writing and staringd in the film Let Me Be Blunt, starring in a commercial for the University of Kentucky and becoming the head comedy writer for a minor league baseball team.

 
Summer Blockbusters vs. Pat Dixon
With the summer blockbuster movie season in full swing, comedian Pat Dixon is once again planning on not seeing a single one of them. That won't keep him from reviewing them though. Not only does this save him a ton of cash, it also keeps him completely unbiased when discussing each feature. Take that Ebert, Roeper and Shalit. In other news, Pat is involved in a revolutionary way to watch stand-up comedy, Stand-up 360 and has a brand new comedy CD titled, Goodbye Forever Fatty.
 
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Ladies & Gentlemen - Comedian Bob Zany
The Zany Report is back and only the return of the BOB&TOM Show from Vacation could possibly compare to the excitement it brings. Bob Zany, legendary standup comedian, Telethon Host, and all around great guy, is ready to run the comedy gauntlet once again in hopes of getting the entire cast to laugh, at least once! And even if he can't accomplish this lofty feat, there's always Fix the Joke, Baby to save the segment from being a complete disaster. Because as we all know, everything's funnier when there are prizes involved.

 

David Cook Sings the Songs of David Cook
Season seven winner of American Idol David Cook first entered pop culture singing other artists songs on the top rated reality show, but his self-titled first album has shown that his musical talent is far more advanced than the program let him showcase.  Cook is a first class rocker who rewrote chart history when 11 of his songs debuted on Billboard’s Hot 100 chart, the highest number of new entries in a single week by an artist since the Beatles.  Since then, Cook has been crisscrossing the country on tour, with upcoming dates in Wisconsin, Minnesota, Iowa, Delaware, Washington D.C. and New Jersey.

 

British Invasion
Originally from London, England, comedian Dave Baker is making a name for himself here in the States while keeping his British perspective. From NY to L.A., Baker is hitting clubs and winning over fans by sharing his views on the American way of life. Baker was recently featured on a CBS special along with some of comedy's biggest stars, and his material can be seen on a number of mobil networks.

 

Why He Watches
Long time friend of the show, Dr. Will Miller. Dr Will is an ordained minister, former standup comedian, keynote speaker, teacher and full-time therapist at a major University, yet somehow he still finds time to write books including Why We Watch and Refrigerator Rights (the latter of which has just recently been re-released with an all new chapter and updated research.) He's also the formorst expert on how classic television secretly revals the inner stuggles in all of us. Meaning, while you watch shows like Mr. Ed and Bewitched to get a few laughs, he's looking to find out what's going on in that messed up brain of yours.

 
It's a Dunn Deal
Sure, it's been a nice relaxing weekend, but we hope you found time to study because Scott Dunn is calling in with another all new History Lesson and History Quiz. Dunn is a stand-up comedian, a novelist, a father of two, and a husband of one. In his spare time (when he's got any) he writes jokes for a number of shows including "Are You Smarter Than a 5th Grader." And that's a little bit about Scott Dunn.
 


 

"Just because they make something in your size doesn't mean you should wear it."
- Windell Middlebrooks

"I'm not in to romancing. If that bitch wants to be pursued, rob a bank!."
- Geoff Brown

"The best mean you can have, according to Kristi, is air."
- Chick McGee

"I've got the social skills of Boo Radley anymore."
- Dave Dugan on working from home

"They should name the smallest phallic shaped mushroom a McGee." - Bob Kevoian

"You just got clock blocked."
- Bob Kevoian to Gunner after his story was interrupted by a commercial break

"I don't criticize people and the way they live."
- Tom Griswold, lying

"In college I used to pass out from drinking all the time. It got so bad that before I went out I would just go ahead and draw a penis on my own face."
- TJ Miller on binge drinking

"Young women are like warm donuts, and older women are like crackers. Sometimes you feel like having a cracker, but you always want a donut."
- Nick Griffin

"I listen to your show all the time" - Tom Griswold to Michael Feldman
"My show's not on all the time."
- Michael Feldman right back to Tom

"Sodomy sounds bad in any language."
- Bob Kevoian

"The metric system makes you're penis sound bigger."
- Ryan Belleville

"Have you ever worn a different deodorant and for the rest of the day you feel like there is a stranger standing next to you."
- Jim Gaffigan

"If it's so great outside, why are all the bugs trying to get inside my house?"
- Jim Gaffigan on camping

"I want to work at an unemployment office because even if they fire you, they still have to pay you."
- Phil Mazo

"If I could punch just one animal in the face, it would be an ostrich."
- "Larry King"

"Sodomy takes the fun out of birdwatching."
- Tom Griswold on gay parks

"I have horrible gay-dar. I could see two guys making out at a bar and think they are just excited about the playoffs."
- Dwight Slade

"Books are for people who don't have ideas of their own."
- Greg Hahn

"I hate it here so what's the rush?"
- Greg Hahn to his former boss about motivation at work.

"Everyone has a butt, Tom."
- Kristi Lee to Tom about teaching kids about proctology

"My son is a horrible driver. He's hit everything but the lottery."
- Mike Armstrong

"I hate porn with plots."
-Bob Kevoian

"In Spanish, 'passionate' means 'loud and irrational.'"
- Pat Dixon on his passionate girlfriend

"My parents got divorced after 40 years. That's the longest game of chicken ever."
- David Dyer

"Last time I went to a gym they gave me a t-shirt with their name on it and asked me not to wear it."
- Wild Bill Bauer on his physical fitness

"Musician people aren't dumb."
- Duff McKagan on the stereotype of rockers

"With the sweater vest and the beard, Gunner looks like a lumberjack going to church."
- Tom Griswold

"Since I got my grills done I'm smiling even when I'm angry. I smile like the Cleveland Indian."
- Guy Torry on having his teeth done

"My pee is okay."
- Tom on accidently dropping his cell phone in the toilet

"Life and I don't always get along."
- Tom Griswold on asking a lot of questions and being skeptical

"You can't play grab-ass unless you're naked."
-Chick McGee

"Here's a quote I want on the page; 'Tom is a douche bag'"
- Bob Kevoian

"Have you ever notice that when you talk about Segways it's hard to transition into another topic?"
- Tom Griswold making a joke about the homonyms Segway and segues

"I got a Snuggie the other day; the blanket with sleeves. Finally, a uniform for depression."
- Pat Dixon

"I've never thought about having kids before, but after having so many computer problems lately..."
- Nick Griffin on kids' knowledge of technology

"I'm guessing Native Americans wish they had had a tougher immigration policy."
- John Evans

"I quit smoking and drinking and I eat better. Now I'm so healthy it makes me sick."
- Pat Dixon

"Calling Kathy Lee 'entertainment' is like calling falling off the roof 'transportation.'"
- Rocky LaPorte

"Is that sound a horse galloping or Tom chewing?"
- Chick McGee on the Tom's table manners

"Hugh Hefner is never giving up power. He's the Fidel Castro of boobies."
- Jeffrey Ross

"After what happened to my 401k, my new retirement plan is the Rapture."
- Scott Dunn

"You know the economy is bad when they start laying off planets."
- Bob Kevoian on why they might have downgraded Pluto from its status as a planet

"'Don't Stop till they say no twice' isn't a sales technique, it's a fraternity slogan."
- Patti Vasquez on pushy sales people

"When deciding between two competing theories, always go with the one that doesn't involve a magic spell."
- Emo Philips on Evolution vs. Intelligent Design

"Diarrhea doesn't work on a nudie beach."
- Tom Griswold

"You're going to hell on a scholarship."
- Spanky Brown to Tom Griswold

"A little girl getting bit by a pony is like being raped by Santa."
- Louis C.K. on crushing people's dreams

"If you can figure out how to kill a guy with a cassette tape, he probably deserves to die."
- Tom Griswold on weapons in prison.

"The desert doesn't make me horny."
- Kristi Lee